Monday, February 22, 2010

full

My head felt very full this weekend.  Full in a "I'm-going-to-throw-up" kind of way.  I would classify myself as an introvert who wishes she was an extrovert.  While I try my darndest to be outgoing and social, really, I'd just rather be curled up on my couch, either alone or with Trav and Bella, reading a book or writing to my heart's content.  Most of the time, this never happens.  Therefore, most of the time I end up feeling overwhelmed and stressed out/bad mood/freakish.


Travis graciously allowed me to stay home from church yesterday morning to have a couple hours by myself.  Three beautiful hours alone.  Alone, to clear my head.  Alone, to be with my God.  Alone, to journal.  Alone, to catch my breath, divulge my deepest & sincerest thoughts to my Wonderful Counselor.  It was refreshing, therapeutic, and made for a happier wife and mama.


As for writing, I was blessed with a couple of bigger opportunities to expand my horizons this weekend. Nothing monumental, but more than journaling by pen and typing a "Mommy" blog every now and then.  I struggled with feeling a sense of "WOW!" - that something I've always loved to do might amount to something, mixed with an unexpected visit from an ever-present enemy: Pride.  Ahhh, the flesh.  I am so prone to fall prey to it's desires.  I was reminded in my time with my Lord the truth of James 1:17:

"Every good and every perfect gift is from above, 
coming down from the Father of Lights
with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change."

On another note, aren't these pictures lovely??  Lest you be deceived and think this is what I'm gazing on every day, I set you aright.  My father took these for me.  Yes, that hill in the distance is right where I grew up.  So picturesque.  Do I miss California? I get asked often.  Ummmm.... don't you miss it simply looking at these photos???  Unfortunately, this is what I'm looking at out my front window right now:

Mr. Winter,
I think it's time you high-tail your hiney to the south side of the equator.
Yours truly,
Summer-lover


To end this post, this little lady -
just came and told on herself.  Well, the Sharpie marker on her face kind of gave it away.  But she did come into the room saying, "Uh-oh, Mama..." and pointed to the other room.  *sigh* You gotta love an honest kid, eh?
--------
P.S. - Many of you have been asking.  YES, I still have more to come on our love story.  Just you be patient. Oh, and thank you for your kind words concerning my last post.  You all make writing a joy.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

I LOVE reading your blog, Jenny, and I look forward to the ups and downs of motherhood (due in June over here!). Your daughter is DARLING! I LOVE that age - and I'm sure you're learning how amazingly cute it is too! Thank you for sharing your life with us, even the blog-stalkers like me who only knew you from afar at NWC! :)

Molly V said...

Not to be a complainer :) but your winter scene looks a lot less wintery than ours here in MN...that 2 feet of snow in our front yard seems like it will never melt!! Love ya, Jenny!

Liv said...

I KNOW what you mean about having some real alone time! It was a good read
- the last post about bella- I really never thought about all of that! I simply see she is this beautiful child- and why wouldn't everyone see her that way? I never thought too deeply into it- I know that how you and trav see her will shape the deeper part of what she believes about herself- and the Lord when the time comes. It was very good to hear your perspective as a mother- my eyes were opened to your forethought as a mother- thankyou for sharing! I loved the pictures! Aria ALWAYS enjoyes seeing bella! I think the picture of her with the hat on looks a lot like trav when he smiles.
miss you all!
Liv

Kali said...

Isn't alone time such a gift? Dan took Caroline for several hours on Saturday morning so I could do the same - and wow does that recharge the batteries :)

Just read your last post and was so touched. I've thought about teaching my daughter about beauty as well, but God has entrusted you & Trav with a unique challenge in that respect. May He continue to guide you as you parent your precious, beautiful Bella.

Adventures with Claire, Jason, and Jonas!! said...

What are these new writing opportunities that you speak of?? Are you writing a book my dear friend?:) I've always wanted to:)

Mama Mote said...

Now that I can have alone time, I do miss my kid times. So glad Trav knows you so well. I AM in California, but I don't have a view like that. Love those pictures. I someday hope to have an ocean view as long as we are living here in Redondo Beach. We'll see if that happens. Love reading your blogs, Jenny. God has gifted you. hugs

Anonymous said...

Jenny...I so love your sweet, honest, tender, funny, loving etc...... blogging. You bless me with every read. Thank you thank you. loving you always... Auntie Deb

Excellent Parent said...

Love this. And your daughter is so beautiful!

Kristin said...

I fully understand the struggle of being an introvert and wishing I could be an extrovert. I'm actually as "central" as they come on the scale, but lean toward introvert. Time alone is a necessity!

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