Let me preface this post by saying this: I married a 5-star guy. He regularly encourages me to get out of the house alone to re-energize myself. He cooks breakfast and gets the kids up in the morning at least a few times a week. He changes diapers. He's not afraid to have all three kids alone for extended periods of time. He cleans. He is amazing. Not to mention, a generous, handsome man. These stories, in no way, reflect on his "flaws."
----------------
This is two stories of two different men that have recently blown my mind. And yes, I'm gender stereotyping. The only reason their actions blew my mind is because they're men.
STORY #1:
We have this little rule in our family. CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF. It's simple, really. Yet, recently, I've noticed that I want to broaden the horizon a bit. Clean up things, whether they're your mess or not, when you see a mess. Little things, like a piece of trash on the floor, a little sprinkle from the tinkle, a toy in the middle of the hallway. If it's not supposed to be there, and you run across it? PICK IT UP. Don't leave it for Mama.
I may have this tendency to leave certain things lying around just to see how long it will take someone else to pick it up. Case in point, I JUST picked up a pile of magnets that had been taken swiped off the fridge and left in a pile at the base of the fridge door. Those magnets have been there for a least the last three days. Nobody touches them. I'm not sure why I do this. I just do. It sort of blows my mind that nobody sees the junk lying around.
Anyways, yesterday, we went to the library. As Bella was unloading all the 200 books onto the living room floor, the receipt with our return dates ended up in the middle of it all. And when I asked her to put all the books into our library basket, that poor receipt got left in the middle of the floor, because alas, it was not a book and therefore had no permanent home (or so I suppose). In the middle of all the shuffle and nursing of babies and cleaning up from lunch, etc., I, too, left the poor receipt lying on the floor.
Around 4:30, the exterminator guy came to our home to spray for bugs. Nice guy. He came inside and I woefully explained our state of excessive cockroaches, etc. As he set out to move about his business of spraying the interior, he stopped when he came to the middle of our living room, bent and PICKED UP THE RECEIPT!!!!! All on his own accord. I could have kissed the man. Well, not really. But I mean, really. Amazing. I just had to thank him.
STORY #2:
We just began a new "small group" of sorts with our church. The couple who hosts at their home is very kind and probably in their early 50's. The husband is a former Air Force Special Forces helicopter pilot. Last night was our second time meeting and we were doing a potluck dinner together. Travis was in the kitchen, helping with some of the cooking while I had Rhett in the Ergo, and was trying my best to reign in Bella and Summer and prepare them to sit still and eat politely during dinner. I juggled their two plates full of food, all the while calling the girls to the table and ordered them where to sit and to "sit still, for heaven's sake." Bob, the husband, saw me, came over, lifted the girls into their chairs. Then, as I began arranging their plates, he came back over with a knife and fork and began to cut up all their food for them, completely without any prompting/asking from me. He also got them their drinks and pulled out my chair for me.
Later in the evening, he took Rhett from my tired arms and held him while seating himself comfortably on the floor to hold Summer in his lap and read to her. Uhhh... completely stunned me. While women do this sort of thing regularly, men don't. It's just not in their nature (or so I assume) to read a mom's mind as to what she needs/when she needs it. He blessed me, for sure.
--------------------
While I have never gone through the "Five Love Languages" book, I will go so far as to say that Acts of Service, unprompted by me, spell out a lot of love!! You agree??? Nothing like a good mind-reading, needing-to-be-completed chore/task act of service to warm my heart.
3 comments:
LOVE THIS. And you should totally read the Love Languages book. It's really good. My love language is far and away quality time - but acts of service are always nice! P.S. Based upon your recommendation, I am now reading "Gone With The Wind" for the first time. I can't believe I haven't ever read it before!! :-)
This reminds me of a conversation I had a few years ago with a male coworker who was working to get his teaching credential. He said a lot of guys feel like their help or affection isn't as welcome with children because of the men (and women, but mostly men) who give them a bad name. While many women wouldn't think twice about saying hi/smiling to a kid or going the next step and helping with spills/etc, a lot of guys (especially men who don't have kids of their own) are worried that if they step in and interact with the kids, the adults in the situation might view them as predatory.
Glad to hear these guys are breaking that mold- I honestly wish more people would step up and help parents out, especially with little ones. (It really does take a village!)
Love this. Your magnet-by-the-fridge story reminds me of my Mom. When she and my dad were first married, he had moved straight from living in his parents' house into sharing a house with her. And he NEVER picked up after himself. After they had their first kid - my older sister - my mom couldn't handle it anymore. For two weeks, she didn't pick up anything he left out. After two weeks, he came home one night and spazzed out because the house was so messy. There were even rotting banana peels she left. After his comments, she picked up the baby, and as she walked out the door, told him to have fun cleaning up.
You have to understand that my mom is one of the sweetest women I know - will probably sit way closer to Jesus in heaven than I will :) So for her to show this much planned sass - amazing.
Post a Comment