I took the girls to the library. Normally, they're really good. Not this time. Summer wouldn't stop running around, pulling books off the shelves. Bella kept whining that she couldn't find the one book she was looking for. They both were LOUD. People stared. I quickly tried to find the book I was looking for, with Summer squirming on my hip, Bella hanging on my leg, pretending she's a dog. I checked out as fast as I could. As we walk out the door, the bottom of the door catches on Bella's flip-flop. It breaks off her foot and she screams out the most blood-curdling scream for me NOT TO LEAVE WITHOUT HER AND HER SANDAL!!!!!!! I whip around and begin yelling at her to BE QUIET!!! Meanwhile, people are walking out of the library, staring at me as if I'm the devil and my kids are my own little demons. Not a proud moment.
Just feeling the need to bare my soul. Ahh... a little better now.
***
Tonight I went over to a friend's house for dinner. Summer wouldn't leave me alone. As in, kept crawling all over my lap, tried climbing onto the kitchen table, under the table. Made having a coherent, sensible, adult conversation nearly impossible. Scratch that. I don't think we had a coherent conversation. I left feeling a mixture of embarrassment at my social skills, and happy to have had some adult interaction.
***
My husband's coming home soon, Lord willing. I am beginning to feel some fear about the reintegration process. The process that always seems so dreamy from far away, but super chaotic and difficult in real life. I'm praying like crazy that God will grant me an extra EXTRA dose of patience, understanding, LOVE, and selflessness. I know I am my own worst critic, but I desire to be so much more excelled in those areas.
***
When Trav's gone, I don't really cook. Bella's a good eater, but Summer is one you have to fight tooth and nail to get more than 3 bites in her mouth. The process makes me lose my "umph" to cook. Therefore, (except for the time we were at my parents' home) we've had an overload of mac n' cheese, grilled cheese, quesadillas, PB&J's, and cereal. I'm not really proud of this, but my kids are still alive and happy. And that's all that really matters.Just feeling the need to bare my soul. Ahh... a little better now.
4 comments:
another day in the life of parenting and motherhood. i count it all joy when i encounter trials knowing they produce... what do they produce again???
I love your writing and the fact that you keep it real. Will be praying for you during the reintegration process. By the way, I love that L.M. Montgomery quote. I just noticed it, so not sure how long it has been there!
My head is nodding with you on each of these points. I've experienced most of these things in the last week too! I'll begin praying for reintegration for you and also praise that you get to reintegrate. Big hug!
Ahh Jenny, it was so nice to catch up on your blog once again! I haven't had much time lately, Ellie keeps me busy and incredibly tired. With a lack of sleep I am struggling with my patience and all I can think of is go and take a nap. Ellie is not much of a napper. Then I am stressing about Braeden starting school and I will have to get up with him at 6am every morning so I will be just super exhausted again. Plus he will start playing football, that is 4times a week from 5-8, 30 min from base. Ellie goes to bed at 7. So I can not imagine how I am going to do it. I am stressing about not having enough time for myself. Then Rob is deploying for 6 months in December, he will be gone in November already for the training. Its a lot these days.
Anyways. Thank you for keeping it real and I really enjoy reading your every day stories and life.
I will be praying for reintegration for you and Trav, I know it can be difficult. Enjoy your 24 hours with the hubby ;)
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